A Tale of a Turtle and a Hamburger*

Once upon a time, there was a mommy turtle who lived with her turtle husband and turtle family in their nice turtle pond with rocks, mud and slime.
The mommy turtle knew these living conditions well, understood the terrain and felt like she had a good grasp on what all it meant to be a turtle. Things were messy, thrown together and sometimes rough, but she liked a life with turtles. Her baby turtles were a little bumpy on the outside, but they were soft and cuddly on the inside and when they needed to be. Best of all, they loved their mommy turtle.

Then one day, someone told the mommy turtle that there would be a HAMBURGER moving in with their family.

WHAT? A HAMBURGER? "Surely you jest" said the mommy turtle {because she had been to turtle college and enjoyed British terminology to sound smarter than the other turtles}. Hamburgers do NOT live with turtles. Doesn't it know it will get Eaten ALIVE here?

But despite her confusion and inability to understand how in the WORLD a Hamburger could be coming to live with her family, it was true.

In a few months, the turtles will be invaded.


And surely they will welcome this Hamburger with open arms.



Because even if she isn't a turtle, she'll fit right in.
The turtle family has always been a fan of beef, carbs and anything smothered in cheese.

To be continued...

# # # # # # # #

Here's more of what we saw:



And since I can read lips, here's what I'm pretty sure she was saying:



Jason, the boys and I are happy to announce that we are expecting a GIRL brand of baby.
Holy Hairbows! We don't what we're going to do with one, but we have a few months to figure it out.

Tips? Advice? Warnings?
Money tree for clothes?
I'll take them.

* The "turtle" and the "hamburger" are what the ultrasound technicians look for to determine the gender of your baby. I won't pull out medical terms here because I'd be on all kinds of spam lists, but I'm pretty sure you can figure out which one belongs to which gender.

You're Good Enough, You're Smart Enough ...

And gosh doggit, I like you.

Since you are clearly the most beautiful and brilliant blog readers in the world, I'd like to get your opinion on the State of the Blog. I would love to know more about YOU to help me get a feel for why you're here. And I'd also like to know your bank account number your likes and dislikes. I mentioned the other day that some blog changes are around the corner {NOT the address}, but I'd love your input as I'm going through these.

Would you take a few minutes to complete this survey, pretty please? It's an anonymous survey and only has 10 very short questions. It's WAY better than the PSAT {and you won't sweat profusely while taking it}.

I promise I'll share the results and maybe even a picture from the mid 80s as a reward.
I won't promise a bowl haircut, but you know it's kinda inevitable.
Or maybe a celebrity meet up story that I've never shared here before.

Either way, it will totally be worth your 3 minutes.

Click here to take survey

Thank you so much for your help!
I'll save a Tagalong Girl Scout Cookie for you {updated: this is a flat out lie; cookies are all gone. I'm sorry.}.

xoxo,

Sugar High

Since V-day has come and gone, we are all coming down from the sugar high.
I'm a fan of any holiday that advertises a fat baby shooting people and encourages eating sweets.

And sweets we ate.

Ollie and Henry's school parties were at the egg-zact same time last Friday. Of course.
So, I ran back and forth to each trying to enjoy each necklace/candy activity, card opening and love celebration.
Here is Ollie (L) opening cards and Henry (R) asking why the heck I kept disappearing?

Just like last year, we went back to our heart-shaped doughnuts at Krispy Kreme on Saturday.
This is about the point where Henry looked up and said, "Mommy? Daddy? I'm happy".
That's my boy.
Just glad we're teaching him about the important things in life.

And please tell me your 4 year olds do this goofy face, too. I believe they have taken "Say Cheeeeeese" to the level that Velveeta has also taken it- nothing similar to the original product.

And a little editing action for you here.
I think the crumbly doughnut face and hand just add character {something not offered with most editing software}.
He's like fat Anne Geddes baby. Without a big sunflower to pop out of.


Saturday night, we went to eat dinner with some good friends. It was the first party where we took our Wii remotes on the road and played 4 player Super Mario Brothers. And we laughed, screamed and jumped hysterically- all the adults, that is.
I would highly recommend this- especially if you haven't played in oh- 20 years or so.

The wife of the hosting couple's home is my doctor friend and hookup who has checked for ear infections on Sunday nights, called in prescriptions and given me drug warnings over the phone at 10 pm. Everybody needs a friend like her.

And I knew that she would appreciate my cake that I made for the get together.

Oh, the jokes. There are so many.
"Would you get your VD off the table?"
"Where's that VD you brought in?"
"A moment on the lips; a lifetime on the.... er... hips- ish"

I only wish it could have made it to Cakewrecks, but, as you can see, I am not a professional cake decorator.

So that was our V-Day weekend: full of sugar, cheese and laughter.
That sounds just about right to me.

How was yours?

An Open Letter to 8th Grade

Dear Eighth Grade,
What did you do with my $27 {wow at the cost; my parents flipped} Hypercolor shirt I HAD to have in 1991? Where is that thing?

And while I'm thinking about it, where are all those Sam and Libby ballet slipper things with the lovely bow on the top? I'm pretty sure I had those gems in every color- including red and dark green.

You know what else I'm missing? My T-shirt ties and Banana Clips.

And what ever happened to our family bag phone that we had to take into Wal-Mart with us in case of a world wide emergency?

Where in the world is my Coca-Cola red and white rugby shirt?

What have you done to me, 8th grade? You have filled me with so many memories, but you turned out to be a traitor and left me with nothing.

I think I know what our landfills are full of:

Pom-poms, megaphones, videos of Saved by the Bell {the important one where Zak and Kelly didn't go to the prom because her dad lost his job and she gave her dress money to her family- let's just say that one was taped}, 1/4 inch barrel curling irons {for bangs, of course} and shoulder pads.

You were good to me at the time, 8th grade, but I would like to see something tangible from all our time together.

Something important, vital, life changing. Maybe a tape of Smells Like Teen Spirit?

We could call it even, then.

Bliss-tastic: The Recap

* Warning: This is a long post with lots of pictures. But there are some of Harry, so just suffer through, okay?*

1. The People
One of the wonderful things about Blissdom is that you get to hang out with amazing and cool people who you stalk think you "know", but really you don't "know". You know?

The bloggers, they are everywhere.

Me, Stephanie and Holley from (In)Courage and Amanda from OhAmanda at the Thursday night Cocktail Party
{Photo by Mary from Giving Up On Perfect}

Jo-Lynne from Musings of a Housewife {I'm assuming you know I'm the gal on the left by now}
{Photo by Mary}

Lisa Leonard from Lisa Leonard Designs, of course.
{Photo by Mary}

My sweet friend who loves me even though I stalk her. Mary took all these pictures and for this one kept saying, "We've got to take it again, you have CRAZY eyes". I do not know what was going on other than my excitement to hang out with my girl, Lisa.

Mary from Giving Up on Perfect {afore mentioned photographer and one of my roomies}, Robin from Pensive and me
{Photo by Moosh in Indy who is also amazing}
Robin led a wonderful and spirit-filled Prayer Breakfast on Saturday morning. I was so glad to be there!

Mary and I were patiently waiting to see Harry! {Photo by my pal Dawn from MHSH}

With Arianne from To Think is to Create.
{Photo by Mary}

There are about 30 of these pictures in the Blissdom Flickr set from many different photographers because we sat here and talked for over an hour.
You have no idea how much I enjoyed our conversation. Love this girl!!

Saturday morning breakfast with the beautiful {inside and out} Sarah Markley, Ashleigh from Heart and Home, Mary, me, Chrissie {Lisa's twin sister and amazing person in her own right} from Handmade Play and Tammy from Greek Grits.
{Have no idea who took this picture, but it was on Mary's camera}
Speaking of grits, all the food was phenominal- not like regular conference food.

But we did sneak out one night to a local fine dining establishment called the Baja Burrito.
You can tell from the signs on the wall that we only eat the best.

This is Holley and me, Ashleigh, Annie from Annie Blogs, Stephanie and Lindsey from The Pleated Poppy.
{Photo by Mary. Can you tell I swiped all her pics?}

We are all wearing Lindsey's amazing poppies {except for her} and they were one of the most fun things about Blissdom because she gave them out with her business card! Even better is that Lindsey is awesome, funny and adorable.

Annie and I kept missing each other in real life and I was so glad to finally hang out. We spilled drinks, knocked over chairs and snorted when we laughed. She's my kind of gal. And she came up with my new tagline when I switch my blog over to WordPress. That's right- the big move's a-comin'. But not to worry- still the same site, but one day you'll pop over and it will be prettier.

Just think of it as having it's eyebrows plucked.

People who I did NOT get pictures with, but got to hang out with and loved {This portion is for 1) name dropping 2) helping myself remember and 3) so you can let me know who you already know and how you love them, too}:

Jessie from Vanderbilt Wife- hello roomie?? Where are our pictures??
Darcy from My 3 Boybarians
Deanna from Design Chicky and Domestic Chicky
Kim and Kris from The DIY Dish
Nester from The Nesting Place
Kimba from A Soft Place to Land
Emily from Chatting at the Sky
Maggie from Gussy Sews
Dedra Herod from Just a Chick
Jessica Turner from The Mom Creative {Who's hubby just wrote an awesome new book!}
Kimberly from Raising Olives
Melissa from A Familiar Path
Jen from Balancing Beauty and Bedlam
Jenny from 86753oh9
Mandi from It's Come To This
Edie from Life in Grace
Tsh from Simple Mom
Steph from Adventures in Babywearing
Melanie from Blogging Basics 101
Kristi from Pink and Polka Dot
Sandy from Reluctant Entertainer
Melissa from The Inspired Room

I am positive that I'm leaving someone out. Please let me know if we are friends and I am forgetting you. Please forgive my dorkiness.

Edited to add the people I LOVE and canNOT believe I left out:
Jill from Diaper Diaries {hysterical AND she can rock at Karaoke}
Melissa from Multi-Tasking Mama {such a fun breakfast together}
Aubrey from Little Bits of Life {THRILLED that she is really close by}
Malia from Just Malia {super sweet and I love her About Me section- you must go read}
Myra from My Blessed Life {Ah. Dor. A. Bull.}

2. The Perks
Y'all, the Blissdom staff did an unbelievable job of providing us all kinds of swag. I wanted to take a picture of all the goodies I came home with, but thought it would be kinda rude to rub all your proverbial faces in it. But just know it was awesome.
Lisa made every attendee a beautiful necklace that says "Bliss".
I won an autographed cookbook from George Duran {funny and a great cook- who I'm just noticing is extremely tall!}.
{Photo by Dawn of MHSH}

And there may or may not have been more things I won like a big jacket from iRobot and a beautiful platter, cross and tea towel from Dayspring. Like I said, I'd hate to rub it in.

Isn't that right, Harry?
{Photo by Dawn}

We wouldn't want to make people upset or sad.
{Photo by Dawn}

Or the least bit jealous.
{Photo by Darcy of My 3 Boybarians}

The scoop on Harry: super kind and cordial, charming {of course} and even joked that he thought we would be wearing red plaid shirts and suspenders... since it was a "loggers" convention.
Oh, it was bad, but I forgave him.

We got to meet him backstage after the concert and since he was flying out right after that to play at the Super Bowl {THE SUPER BOWL}, we took pictures in groups to be sure to get everyone in. {Please don't get me started on the fact that I'm so far away. I couldn't tell how we were entering and was last in with my group. Hindsight. Danggit.}

Much like Marcia Brady when she met Davy Jones, I have yet to wash my hand.

3. The Puh, Puh... um... The Lessons
The best part about all the Bliss is taking a step back to look at why we blog.

I love to tell stories- in person and on the world wide interweb. I like to encourage other people and make them laugh. I enjoy relating to women, laughing together and helping each other when needed {which is often for me!}. I think God likes a community that will do that for each other- in real life and online.

For my kids, this is the only cut, stickered and pasted scrapbook they are going to get unless I start putting silly robots, full sized men or balloons in notebooks. And that's about as likely as my blinds being dusted.

The best lesson and a consistent message from all the writing workshops was to be yourself {authenitic, organic, original- it was said a dozen ways}. Seems pretty simple to me, but I think sometimes as blog readers, we {me, too!} look at other people's sites and think, "I wish I could ____ like she does". Whether that blank be cook, dress, write, take good pictures, have cute kids, craft like Martha or find Seven Jeans at Goodwill.

It's a lot of the same thoughts that go through our heads as women in the first place.

But especially on a blog, people want you to be who you really are.

Which person are you at a party?
If you like to give fashion compliments or advice, do that on your blog.
If you like to talk about deep, spiritual matters, do it on your blog.
If you like to tell stories about your kids' poop-looking artwork- well- lets' just say that's taken, but you can join in, too!

The biggest compliment I got all weekend was from a reader who said, "You are really just like I thought you would be!" Wow. Did you catch that I have a reader? What in the world?

I think of this blog as a tiny extension of me. But not like hair extensions because that would be weird.

Puh-lease tell me you're going to be at Blissdom in 2011!
{I will definitely be there- possibly with a tiny baby.}
Or who do you "know" {stalk} that I happened to meet?
And, if you want to get all kinds of deep, why do you blog?