Why you shouldn't follow Mapquest directions and other musings from I-65

I spoke at a conference on Thursday for work down in Orange Beach, AL. I don't know why I decided to drive, since it is 6+ hours away from my home, but somehow it seemed ridiculous to fly to a location in my same state (and I would have most definitely had to fly through Atlanta to get there). But, if I had driven 6 hours north I would have been in Ohio and would have flown without question. I had time to ponder this absurd decision and many other thoughts while I spent 13 precious hours of my life in a rented tin can rattling down the interstate.

Since I was bored, I decided to take some pictures and pretend I was a photojournalist. Please forgive the quality of these pictures. Most were taken at 77 mph.

Here is yours truly while driving. I don't remember any rule in Driver's Ed about photographing yourself while driving- or talking on your bag phone for that matter- so I think it's perfectly fine.

OK. I'm interested to hear your views on this. I am all for a monogram on a bag, jewelry, a key chain or a purse. But a car? Is that acceptable? In hot pink? As if we thought a man had a curly monogram on the back of his minivan?About this time, I decided to follow Mapquest directions. I should have known better, but I was just along for the ride. The ride that took me through people's neighborhoods and FLORIDA to get to Orange Beach, AL. Here are some of the local scenes from my off-interstate adventure.

Just missed the gun show. Danggit. And really the sign below it is about as humorous.

You probably can't read this, but the minivan's bumper sticker says, "Screw it. Let's ride." With a Harley Davidson logo. Yes. I think they are compensating for their car van choice. And maybe trying to scare the other moms in carpool. I hope the driver wears black leather chaps every day to pick up her kids from school.And clearly I was near a race track - or else they advertised with Mapquest to take people to their race track- because I passed approximately 42 of these signs. I'd hate to have clear signage to the beach (without passing through 13 speed traps small towns), but I better well have a way to get to the race track. Thank you, Florida.

One the benefits of getting up super early this morning to come home was getting to see the sunrise. I've always wanted to go to Pine Apple. Has anyone ever been there? Is it as lovely as it sounds? Refreshing and delicious? Or is it spiky around the edges?This is my favorite sign of all on I-65. It's on I-65 North just north of Prattville. It has been recently updated, but the red devil is still there with his sickle to "get you". I pretty sure that you say "Gi- chew" for this. Does anyone know what possessed the town of Clanton to hoist a large peach hiney in the air? Really, can you think of anything else when you pass this? And how could this possibly hold an acceptable amount of water? And my favorite spotting of the whole trip was leaving the rental car place in Huntsville today. This car owner has made his own homage to High Country in Scottsboro, AL. Those are stick on orange letters people. Did I even need to show that the license plate was from Alabama? Ahhh. So good to be home.