In which the word "Douche" appears on my blog

I am here to tell you I am lyrically challenged.

It all started with MJ back in good ole days. I had the Thriller album {YES- vinyl} and played that thing till it melted- or was warped. Who remembers what those big old Frisbees-lookin’ things did anyway?

Back to Michael, when he sang Billie Jean, we moon walked across our brown shag carpet and sang, “Billie Jean has got my glove, UHH”.

There was no mention of a “lover” in our version and I’m pretty sure my parents were happy that way! It wasn’t until college that I knew the real words.

I also thought a Chest of Drawers was called “Chester Drawers” until my college roommate told me otherwise, but I’d never reveal my redneckness to the whole wide world, so let’s keep that under wraps, okay?

I love these song mix ups, so for Amanda’s Top Ten Tuesday, I’m playing along with the Top 10 Songs whose lyrics I have mistakenly identified or have just made fun of because they sounded funny.

1. Billie Jean/ Michael Jackson
- See above. She’s "got my glove, UHH”

2. Beast of Burden/ Rolling Stones
- “I’ll never leave your pizza burning” {pronounced “peeetza”, obviously}

3. Hotel California/ The Eagles
- “On a dark desert highway, cool whip in my hair” {especially fun to sing on road trips}

4. Purple Haze/ Jimi Hendrix
- “Excuse me while I kiss this guy” {No explanation needed here. I would definitely kiss this little guy:}


5. Blinded by the Light/ Mannfred Mann’s Earth Band {of course I had to look that up}
- Do I even need to write this? You know there is a “douche” in this song and it makes me kinda cringe, but it has to go on this list. What in the world were those stupid words?

6. Secret Agent Man/ Johnny Rivers
- “Secret Asian Man” {especially fun at Chinese restaurant, but probably in poor taste}

7. Bad Moon Rising/ CCR
- “There’s a bathroom on the right” {always fun at a frat party and usually correct!}

8. Night Moves/ Bob Seger
- “Workin’ on a knife wound” {I guess I got this and the Night Shift – an ER night shift- song confused.}

9. Bennie and the Jetts/ Elton John
- “she’s got electric boobs, a mohair suit, you know I read it in a maga-zeeee—haaane” {Clearly this is true since he read it in a magazine.}

10. Tiny Dancer/ Elton John
- “Hold me closer, Tony Danza” {You'd think with this being the title, one would know the words, but it's just much more fun to picture Elton and Tony, isn't it?}


Ah, yes. Have a lovely day.
You can thank me later when you are still singing about Tony Danza at dinner.

So what are your favorites from this list?
What lyric did I leave out that you always got confused/ laughed about?

And please tell me the words to that wretched feminine hygiene song if you know them... I've got to get THAT and Tony Danza out of my head.

Hopefully I can replace with some peeeeetza and cool whip in my hair.

The Birthday Song

For everyone who asked by e-mail... fine, here it is! Mom (and others)- you've got to learn to comment in the comment section! It's really easy.
Also, my mom wanted to clarify that she learned this song from her mother-in-law (my grandmother, of course) and she learned it from her mother-in-law- Honey Hart. (I think Honey may have been her real name.) Maybe I'll be able to teach it to a daughter-in-law someday! Also, you traditionally count by years instead of months- and you can count by 5 or 10 if you have too many years!
Enjoy... or, rather- try not to make fun of my singing.

Henry has a birthday!

Shirt pictured here a sweet gift from "Auntie" Donna! We love it!

OK, well a HALF a birthday! Henry turned 6 months old 2 days ago. We celebrated with the ritualistic singing of the birthday song that my mom always sang to us. It goes like this:

Henry has a birthday,

We're so glad!

Let us see how many

He has had.

As we count our fingers

We are told:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6!
Yes, our fingers say he's

6 MONTHS OLD!

If you need the tune to this, then you'll have to call me or e-mail me and I'll send you the video (hdunham[at]knology.net) . I do have it documented on video, but it's much too embarassing for the WORLD wide web. :-)

Happy half-birthday, sweet angel Henry! Mommy and Daddy love you and we are so proud and blessed by you every day!