A Mixed Bag of Updates

I got home a little while ago from my massage. I am a different person from when I left. Let me tell you, the benefits of a massage are more than the sheer pleasure of a stranger rubbing you down; it's like to get to escape to a little island for an hour. An island with neverending trail mix, faux water falls, wonderful relaxing muzak, plush bathrobes and rubber slippers that never quite fit right. Besides the shoes, it was so stinking relaxing. I don't want to say I needed it, because I'm sure that there are many more people that need it worse than I do, but I am very grateful for it. A special whoop whoop goes to my friend Laura who sent me a gift card for my birthday that I used to finance this special splurge tonight! I had a hot stone massage tonight and I would highly recommend it!


If I happen to be on your Christmas list, please let me give you a not-so-subtle hint: I love to be pampered. I would never buy a massage for myself. Thus, if you would like to get me something that I would love and I would never buy for myself, contact Terreme here. Don't feel like you are getting a lesser gift because it's a gift card; this is the gift that keeps on giving. Just think, if there were a dozen kind souls out there who felt moved to have this kind and overworked mother rubbed down monthly, then you could make it happen. Sure, it would cost more than sponsoring a child with Sally Struthers, but you know me. (You don't know where that other money is going. There could be someone who is actually buying a cup of coffee every day and writing those notes back to people in America.) And I would put your picture here. Your generosity would be admired by dozens of people.
This is actually a great idea. I'm going to begin a spa and plastic surgery fund and have a place where you can donate over there on the right. I can make a sappy commercial, too. Oh, you just wait.

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In other news, I got a B+ in my History class! I guess I'm okay with that, but I never got a B before in a history class in college. I also never had a full time job or 2 children when I was in college the first time, so I'm going to make myself be okay with a B+.

You know what, though? I kind of think the "+" is a slap in the face. Why not just say "B"? It's kind of like when you ask for an item at a store and the kind employee tells you with a sad/ smirkish face that they just sold the last one. Why tell me if I was that close?

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My husband and I did something together for the first time last night. We've been together for a decade and have never gotten this close in our relationship before. He has seen parts of me that I'll never see (quite literally- with a couple of C-sections and all), but this was a new level of intimacy. We neti potted together! That's right. We went there.
Since Jason and I are both stopped up- his combined with a nasty cold- I went to the Walgreen's on the corner and invested $12+ in a plastic neti pot. If you don't know what this is, then you are missing out. Basically, it's a small tea pot with a spout that is shaped for your nose. You pour warm filtered water (does it count if the filter on our refrigerator has a red light on it- meaning it needs to be changed?) combined with their mysterious saline packet into one side of your nose. Then you watch it come out the other side of your nose. That's right- nasal irrigation. Then you turn around and do it again on the other side.
This video will give you a comical idea of what it's supposed to look like. The man/ woman here is much too docile in his/ her approach, though. Jason and I were choking/ screaming, "Is it coming out?" and "It's getting down my throat!!!". I guess we were first timers and will get better with practice. Apparently people in Asia have been doing this daily for thousands of years. It does make you feel better and cleans you out pretty good, but it's kind of like hocking up a salt lugey through your nose and balancing on a tight rope while you're doing it, so I can see why it isn't so popular over here in the western world. And I'm sure with that description you're rushing out to buy one right now.
OK, that's all I'm leaving you with tonight. Not even a picture of a neti pot. Oh wait! Here's a little candy cane with some warm milk for your holiday indulgence! Good night!