Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Bump Pics and My Closeted Business

Alright, I caved and took some belly bump shots for you today. I tried to tell you people (online and in real life) that I have really large children ( 9+ and 10+ lbs) and get big pretty quickly. I don't know if anyone really believes me until about, well... now. Wonderfully nice people are saying things like, "WOW! You look REALLY PREGnant" (emphasis on PREG for some reason). How am I supposed to respond to that?
I'm thinking, "WOW! What are you going to say for the next 15 weeks!?". But I'm sure I manage something kind.

I thought about just showing you my vantage point.

But that wouldn't be fair.

So I took some shots in the boys' bathroom today. While I was there, I noticed a few things:
1) Their mirror is horrendously dirty.
2) Those towels in the back were not straight.
3) I match their bathroom today!
4) It feels really goofy smiling at yourself in the mirror.
bump 1- 23 weeks

This was a lot more fun.
bump 2- 23 weeks

And then I started snorting laughing at my dirty mirror and piggy face and the possibility of placing these blackmail shots of MYSELF online. (And I straightened the towels.)
Bump 3- 23 weeks

The front view is not that bad if you take out the tongue and the shirt that looks like it belongs to my 4 year old.
Bump 4- 23 weeks

And no photo shoot is complete without a fish face, of course.
bump 5- 23 weeks

So there you have it, folks. I hope that answers your burning questions. THAT is what I look like.
At 23 weeks PREGnant. That's right. Twenty- three- not a typo.

In other news, I've been hinting that I've been working on a "project" that's taking up all my "free time" and I'm sorry I've been out of the blog loop (is that the "bloop?).

Here's a pictoral clue as to what's going on.
We have recently purchased this:
monogramming machine
And I started making test samples of these:
first towels

More info to come really soon!

P.S. Is it okay to say that I love Jesus, but hate Easter grass?
Just asking...

Easter grass

P.P.S. (I'm pretty sure I haven't written that since 4th grade) I'm thinking of doing a video for this Friday Favorites! Be sure to come by and play! I will try to go live with the linky Thursday night around 10:00 pm CDT. See you then!

Monday, March 29, 2010

I Used to Be

If you have children, then you are familiar with this phenomenon.
For some reason we moms describe ourselves as what we "used" to be. It's like we need validation that we did used to have some sort of contribution to society before we wiped boogers and hineys. Here's how this sounds in a sentence: "I am a stay at home mom now, but I used to make major decisions with a big time company. They trusted me with things like reports and presentations- not coupon lists and Nick Jr. theme songs."
Have you said that?

This isn't just for full time moms, either. I work part time and am still familiar with it. (And I when I worked full time as a mom and employee, I would come up with lists of how I really did spend a LOT of time with my kids (I DID) and how someone else wasn't really raising them. This is a horrible game to play with ourselves, folks.)
Here's my plan: we all are working our spanx off, so lets just give each other a break. I think we give ourselves enough guilt about our own situations and we don't need to pass out that goofy guilt to others. Everybody is doing the very best that they can. Period. So let's support each other instead of tearing each other down. (There's a Michael Jackson song in there somewhere.)
Off my soapbox, now.

Back to the topic, I used to be a public speaker. I knew how to drop my Southern accent (so people didn't think I was stupid), question the audience to keep their attention and provide humor through jokes/ top ten lists/ audience participation, etc. I traveled the country, was on TV shows and shot a few kids movies. I was skinny, in my 20s and had more energy than that silly rabbit with the drum.

Because of this past experience, this weekend at Spring Market, I was the go-to girl as the emcee for our speakers. And for some reason, they put big ole preggers me on the TV (sorry I can't embed the lovely video here, you have to click on that link). I hadn't slept in days, I have no idea what my hair was doing or why my blinks were that long and pronounced. And the interview itself was about 5 minutes- but they showed 9 seconds- if that gives you an idea of my speaking abilities at this point.

I have lost it. If I ever had it, that is.
But I think I'm okay with it. 

I do know more about reverse phychology, cleaning up songs and trains than I ever thought possible. I pride myself now on great book reading renditions vs. great marketing presentations and I conduct my morning meetings with Froot Loops and reports on pre-school friends. I race for the good spot on the school party sign up lists instead of the good parking spot at the office.

I am still working on figuring out how to get it all done with style and grace, but it's much better than figuring out office politcs (birthday party invite list politics is just as bad, though).
And since I don't have to wear pantyhose, I think this is a pretty fair trade.

Did you "used" to be something?

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Friday Favorites: Early Egg Hunt

Last weekend while we were down in Dothan, my Grandmother Hart invited the boys over on Friday for an early Easter Egg Hunt since we weren't going to be there for Easter. Not that my mom casually rubbed that in mentioned that 42 or so times, either.
None of you get any sort of guilt trips like that, do you?

Despite the cold shoulder about Easter, the weather was warm and amazing and my grandmother's yard was starting to bloom.
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She was so gracious (at 80-smoosh-covers mouth-smoosh) to go hide eggs in the yard for the boys and help the hunting begin.
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They both took to it like fish to water- or more like kids to ice cream (at our house).
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So they proceeded attack the eggs as quickly as they could (we didn't have baskets; that didn't stop us)
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and then hide them again.
March 10.3 105

I loved spending time with my grandmother and watching her with my kiddos.
She enjoys children,
March 10.3 102

communicates and loves them with ease
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and laughs easily. (Do you think she knows that candy that Henry is eating is from last Easter?)
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What an amazing legacy of love and kindness- and my favorite thing this week.

What's your favorite this Friday?
Any favorite book, gift from your husband or appliance that worked without breaking?
Did you get to shower every day? (Not me!)
Or have you started a new Facebook game addiction?
Let me know in the comment section and/ or link your post from your blog below!

Here are some things to remember:
1. Please link directly to your POST link; not your entire blog. This is so someone clicking around next week can get to your post about favorites when they track back.
2. Please try to visit and comment on other people's links. The most fun is discovering a new and fun blog that was hidden right beneath you on the list! I know you would be friends; I just KNOW it!
3. I love to offer Friday Favorites for you to find new blogs, friends and favorites, please share that reciprocal courtesy by linking back here so that everyone can join in the fun. It’s as easy as just putting a little line at the bottom of your post.

Have a Fantastic Friday!

What's Going On

What's going on?
What's going on?What's going on?
I woke up with that in my head. You're welcome.
Here are several other things that are swirling through my pea brain today:

* Y'all!
Friday Favorites will be tomorrow, so don't forget to link up later on tonight or tomorrow!

* I received my new copy of the Stuff Christians Like book yesterday (pre-ordered about 6 months ago) and was in stitches for the majority of the night. If you do not read Jon's blog, you are completely missing out. I love satire (shocked?) and his writing style is hysterical.
My favorite part of the book last night outlined when you should pray before meals (not before anything with nougat center or at Christian fast food places- e.g. Chic-fil-A, but yes before Taco Bell- because a bean or guacamole gun needs prayer). If you have been in a church 30 minutes or 30 years and you have a sense of humor- you will love this book. (And I don't get any sort of money from those links; that's just my unpaid opinion.)

I am so appreciative of people who are GREAT at what they do and are Christians, too. I'm not a big fan of listening to most Christian radio or reading Christian books because they're "Christian"- a lot of the time it's lame-o. I like good music, comedy or writing- period. Some of my favorites who are amazing at weaving their Christianity into their excellent work are: Zac Levi (actor- my love outlined in this earlier post), Rick and Bubba (a radio show), Toby Mac (a singer/ white rapper-ish without any relation to Vanilla Ice), Go Fish (kids music) and the afore mentioned Jon Acuff (writer/ blogger/ satirist).

Let me know your favorites! I'd love to add to my list!

* I am not sleeping.
I'ts not like I've given it up for Lent. I just have so much running through my brain it won't shut down at night. That and this little baby girl does Baby Taebo throughout the night.
I did not approve of Billy Blanks anywhere near my uterus, so I don't know how this has happened.

*  Spring Market is this weekend!
This is the event where I got to meet Vern Yip last year and do some serious shopping. This year, I'm working on the committee and am so ready for it to be OVER am loving every second of this wonderful, community service.
Seriously, it is great. But if you have ever been involved in a fundraiser/ big event like this, you know that the behind-the-scenes people are about to fall over once the event finally arrives. They're just smiling at you because they are crazy.

And I might have had my picture in the paper advertising the event. And/ or I could have been hiding my big 'ole baby belly in the paper. I'll let you be the judge.
Spring Market/newspaper
There's nothing a huge sign can't handle. Right?

* My mom got me hooked on Pathwords when I was in Dothan last week.
This is a Facebook game that's like a word search and it's more addictive than girl scout cookies. Seriously, I think in Pathwords, now. I have never played any Facebook games before (you know I'm anti-Farmville), so this tells you how addicting it is. My good friend Jessie has 1680 points or something as her high score. I'm thinking about de-friending her on Facebook because I can't live up to that score in my face every day. She IS a book editor, though, so the girl knows her words. (And I am very Southern/ anti-confrontational and couldn't actually de-friend anyone unless they talked bad about Paula Deen or some other similar crime.)

My high score is 780 and I got REALLY lucky one game.
The worst part about this game is that each round is 5 minutes. So, if you get sucked in to 3 or 4 rounds (because I can't end with a 260!), then you've wasted a huge, heaping amount of time. But somehow I still love it!
Do you play any Facebook games?

Off to start my day!
And hopefully have a little Marvin rolling though my head most of the day.
Ooooh HOOOOOH! What's going on...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

If I Drank Shampoo...

It would be this one.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Why Mommies Can't Talk on the Phone

Tonight as we finished dinner, a lovely friend called to chat.
I was thinking how pleasant it was that my children were playing so well together. Quietly.

And "Quietly" should have been my clue.

Ollie came down to tell me he "was trying to clean up, but the bubbles were everywhere".

And just like the bubbles pop in the bath, so popped my illusion that my perfect children were quietly humming Mozart ditties to each other upstairs.

This isn't the first crime committed around here, you know. But together, this duo can demolish an area in a record time.

the crime scene
Really? The Bible AND a Library Book? Have you children no limits? No couth?

And just in case you thought the dogs were to blame for this bubble bath gone bad:
the pants
(I guess the real question is if you need more detergent for this load of laundry...)

So here are the criminals.
Those masterminds of destruction.
Plotting evil between each cartoon.
the perps
Don't let that banana sticker or the bare legs fool you.
They are constantly scheming their next attack.

Just waiting for the phone to ring.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Friday Favorites:: My Old Room

Do you remember what your room from high school looked like?

Mine had twin beds, white walls and Anne Geddes prints all around. There was a megaphone in the corner, prom pictures of all my friends proudly displayed and silly notes from class sealed away in a box on my dresser- not to be touched by my sister.

I have no idea what my comforter looked like or if there were curtains at all. {I'm sure there were, but obviously those weren't important to me then.}

This week we have been visiting with my parents and mom told me she "updated my room", but I didn't realize she had HGTV updated it! Take a look at the Vern Yip-ped, NEW version of my old room:

March 10 016
The comforter is a matelasse and it's super soft {I think she said she got it at Ross or TJ Maxx- you know- someplace you'd never be able to find it again}. The bed skirt and curtains are made of a dupioni silk she found at Hancock's and had someone make for her.

Mom's love of pillows has long been a joke in our family. Don't get me wrong, I love a nicely made bed with several pillows, but my mom has been known to have 17 or so on a bed. She's like the Imelda Marcos of accent pillows.  This bed only has a measley 10, but I think it's perfect.

I can't say enough good thinks about a well-hung curtain. Hang 'em high, girls! It makes such a big difference in a room. Look how tall these make the room appear!

All this wicker accent furniture came from Other Mama's house and it works well in here. There is talk of painting it, but I think it looks nice, as is. And this little sitting area is divine! Love the seat accent fabric. {I didn't leave out the "I" in that last sentence; that was an order.}

sitting area

Here's the other view and my failed attempt of cleaning up the room before I took pictures. I'm pretty sure the painting will be actually hung on the wall, but they haven't gotten there, yet. And she says she's still looking for the right picture/ painting/ whatever to go above the bed. I told her as long as it wasn't a sharp, rusty knife display that could possibly fall, she could do no wrong in my book.  painting

And I can't leave out my favorite little addition to the room. This is mom's baby shoe- bronzed {she didn't have to wear it like this}. But she did wear the heck out of it, didn't she? I wonder if they ripped it at the shoe place for effect. My poor children won't quite get the same effect with a velcroed tennis shoe or a croc.
March 10 021

This was easily my favorite thing this Friday {other than visiting my family, of course- this public service announcement added for political correctness}. I think we've come a long way from dead corsages and pom poms, baby.

How about you? What's been your favorite this week?

I'm trying a new picture linky this week. Your link to your post will still be there, but you get to pick a picture from your post or blog {you will be directed; it's super easy} to show a little bit more of your link. Emily and Jen had this on their blogs and I was so excited about it! I hope you are, too!

Here are some things to remember:
1. Please link directly to your POST link; not your entire blog. This is so someone clicking around next week can get to your post about favorites when they track back.
2. Please try to visit and comment on other people's links. The most fun is discovering a new and fun blog that was hidden right beneath you on the list! I know you would be friends; I just KNOW it!
3. I love to offer Friday Favorites for you to find new blogs, friends and favorites, please share that reciprocal courtesy by linking back here so that everyone can join in the fun. It’s as easy as just putting a little line at the bottom of your post.

Let me know your thoughts on the image linky. Happy Friday!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The Skinny on the Story

Sorry to leave you hanging like a bad episode of 90210 where you don't know if Donna "goes all the way" or not. I appreciate those of you who played along the other day trying to decipher what our "normal" Spring Break day was like. But for those who want to know the real story, here goes:

I don't know about you, but at our house, if we don't have to be anywhere by 8:30, then it's practically impossible to get anywhere by 11:00. And then you might as well eat lunch before you leave. So we brought out the gourmet goods: PB & J. My dad always mixed the 2 together before he spread them on the bread, so of course, that is the "right" way to do it. Anybody else in that camp?

{He also calls it "glop glop" for some reason, but that doesn't seem as appealing, so let's just forget I mentioned it.}

Henry thinks this is the "right" way to eat the sammy:
March 10.2 006

Jason had taken our dog Luke to the groomer that morning, so we ventured out to the "Free Zoo" a.k.a. PetSmart to pick him up after lunch. While we were there, we tweeted at some birds
March 10.2 017

pointed at some furry rats on wheels {some people call them hamsters, I guess}
March 10.2 020

and then finally picked up Luke. {yes, Anonymous commenter, he is a Bishon Frise, but he is not full bred. He's also part poodle.}

Here's the truth: we're looking for a new home for Luke. As much as it pains me, we are not the right family for him right now. He needs to be walked, loved, fed on a regular schedule and not ridden like a horse. Those things would probably make him NOT snap at our children. As things are right now, he snaps at them and will potty on their toys. It's safe to say they have a hate/ hate relationship.

We have him listed through an agency, but we haven't found the right home for him, yet. This is a hard situation either way, but we really feel that we are doing the best thing for him and for us- even though it makes me feel horribleThe dogs were our furry children before we had children. Leia loves the kids; Luke notsomuch.
March 10.2 040

Where was I?
Oh, the good part! This check was from consigning the kids clothes at Kids Kloset! Can I get a whoop whoop? I took in 100 items and only had 8 returned, so I'm pretty proud of that!
Do you consign your children's clothes?
March 10.2 050

While we were waiting at the bank drive through line, the boys came up with the most ridiculous game to play- pratically snapping each other with a ball yo-yo thing. And they could not have been happier.
Is this a boy thing? They loved it and laughed hardest of all when one of them got snapped. "Owwwww! Hahahaha!"
Boys are weird.
March 10.2 052

Then, across the street from the bank I saw this!
March 10.2 068

You have no idea how hard it was for me not to go in there- what with my love of cheap food AND a sale! But we had Luke in the car, it was near nap time and I didn't have my coupons.

There. I said.
Hello, my name is Hillary and I'm a coupon addict.
It started as a social thing; a quick high. But now it's gone to a new level.
And I'm sure I'll get back to "normal" soon, but I'm in the zone right now.
So we headed back home.

While his little brother napped, Ollie took advantage of some time to put together a few puzzles without someone trying to steal all the pieces.
March 10.2 073

Then, the ultimate reward for helping put up the dishes: Thomas Stickers!
What I wouldn't give if this lasted into teenage-dom. I'm sure he'll want cold hard cash some time very soon.
March 10.2 111

That night we built a cave and found some wild and wooly bear hunters lurking around.
March 10.2 119

Then daddy finally made it home around 7:45! The boys were so glad to have someone to tackle and I was thrilled not to be the tackle-ee {at least the attempted tackle-ee}.
March 10.2 194

Does anybody else's Spring "Break" look similar to this?
I do love to sleep in, but somehow I still need more sleep from all our "relaxation".


Here's what's really going on behind the scenes in my world {in the writing style of stream of consciousness because I can't muster much else}:

* Henry is trying to potty train himself.
March 10.2 011
This might seem like a great thing to most of you, but I have a one piece outfit for him to wear for Easter, so we will be waiting until the weekend after to do the potty training boot camp. I can't tell you how many times I've told him, "You can't use the potty until you're a big boy. You're not a big boy, yet." That's nice and encouraging, isn't it?
June Clever's got nothing on me.

* Today is St. Patrick's Day and I still somehow feel like I HAVE to wear green. Maybe it's that my mom was an elementary teacher {who probably taught some of you} and she decorated our house, her classroom and our wardrobes per seasonal color. Please tell me some of you have moms that were teachers, too, and did this.

Here's the break down, in case you missed out on this: Jan- white/ blue, Feb- red/ pink, March- green, April- pink/ yellow, May- red, June- purple/ pink, July- red/ white/ navy blue, Aug- orange, Sept- brown/ blue, Oct- orange/ black, Nov- orange/ gold, Dec- red/ green.

Now that the DaVinci Color Wheel Code has been unlocked, I fully expect you to start dressing appropriately.

Oh, and the only green maternity shirt I have {for 40 degree weather} looks like St. Patrick's personal tent maker- St. Omar- weaved it for me. And that's how I'm rolling today because my mama raised me on that dang color wheel.

* Ollie is transitioning between napping in the afternoon and not napping. March 10.2 062
I know; he's 4 1/2 years old. And that's how I like it. A nap is a mommy's best friend. He's been taking short naps or napping every other day and I didn't realize how much I needed that time to myself in the afternoon. He'll come down to my office and play games on MY computer which doesn't allow me to email, for the love of Peter St. Patrick! So, I'm pretty behind on emails, blog reading, general internet surfing- you know- the important stuff. I think I'm going to set up some sort of desk for him down there. Any suggestions for what he can do during that time when his brother is still napping?

I've tried quiet time in his room, but he falls asleep and would sleep all day- which is great; he is definitley my child- but then he's up until 10:00 pm. And that's later than I'm up sometimes, so something's not right about that.

* Baby girl's room is not even CAH-loooose to being started. Baby Girl Dunham 003
I don't even quite know what I'm looking for, yet. And apparently everyone else is flipping out about this but me. I guess the flipping out comes in since we're moving the boys to bunk beds, painting Henry's room and then starting over in there. But if I recall, new babies can stay in a pack and play for a while, right? RIGHT?
Or a sock drawer or something?
Poor, poor third child.

In other baby news, I got a nice box full of clothing from a sweet blog reader and friend, Stacy! She has 3 cutie pie little girls and sent the sweetest outfits from her latest addition- who is only 10 weeks old! And she included in her sweet note that one was "the outfit she wore home from the hospital". I'm sending that back to you framed or something, Stacy. We can't wear that! What if she had irreparable spit up or something on it? Oh my. I couldn't handle it. But the rest of the adorable clothes- we'll wear those for sure! Thank you!

* In other news, I have a huge, life- altering {maybe I exaggerate... maybe} project going on behind the scenes that I'm not quite ready to talk about, yet. But it is taking up loads of time and mental energy. And you will be the first to know about it as soon as the word is out!

Alrighty- still eating bran muffins {should have food colored them green!} and they're ready!
Happy St. Patty's Day!

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