Thursday, February 19, 2009

A Seriously Shallow Question

Jason is in Colorado skiing for 5 days with a big group of our guy friends.
Don't worry, I am going on a girl trip (or 4) later this year. They are having so much fun and need that guy time, so I'm happy for him.
The only reason I'm telling the blogosphere this (since I said I'd never mention if my husband was out of town, you know- thieves and crazy UPS men and all) is that my parents called at 6:00 pm tonight to let me know that they were coming into town tomorrow. This is wonderful news because I definitely need the help this weekend! But, it left me 18 hours before their arrival to clean this pile of filth, go to a 2 hour meeting (with children), have a full day of work- oh, and sleep.

And watch Grey's Anatomy. (What do you think is wrong with Izzy??)

Priorities, you know.

So, I'm scrubbing the house like a mad woman and Jason calls to tell me how beautiful and wonderful it is in Keystone and how we should go there for our 10th anniversary. Since our 10th anniversary is 2 years away, I do like to hear that he intends on coming home and continuing our marriage. Always a nice reminder.

But here is the thing, waaaaay back in my mind, from around 1990- near all the old Seventeen Trauma-rama articles and my crush on Zack Morris- I thought you were supposed to get a ring upgrade at 10 years! Is that crazy? Has anybody else got this carved in their mind?

Let me just tell you that I am not an extravagant person. I do not have a lot of expensive jewelry nor do I come across as flashy. Quite the contrary, actually. You might question if I showered some days. And I do shower.
Most days.

But I do like nice things. I don't have a lot of them, but I like them.

I have never even mentioned anything about another ring to Jason (until he reads this, of course, but I'm hoping it will be buried on this page by the time he gets home) because I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings, I think that is such a silly and shallow thing to bring up AND I know that our treasures are not on this earth.
I do.

But why do I keep thinking that in the back of my mind??

I do not know where we will live, what our financial situation will look like, what our health will be and where our economy will be in 2 years. But we are going to play this game for fun as if this was your choice today.

So, here's the question. If you had to choose between one or the other (don't even ruin the fun and comment both), would you choose a ring upgrade or a cool ski vacation for a 10th anniversary celebration?

Pretend it is the Price is Right and you are the first bidder in the Showcase Showdown and you get to choose from the 2 showcases. Which would you choose?

I'm also putting a poll at the side over there (if I can figure it out) so you can continue to weigh in if you aren't the commenting type.

I'm anxious to hear your pro and con list. And any Trama-rama from 7th grade. Just whatever suits your fancy.


CL said...

Awww, I don't think you are shallow for thinking or asking this at all. I personally would choose the vacation. I'm not sure how much that means from someone divorced and childless but when I was married, I always thought I would never want another ring. He picked it out and wanted it for me and I always wanted to have that to remind me where we started and how far we had come. Obviously now that is a little different, but I still feel the same way. Sam and I have talked about it and he knows for me, I want a marriage much more than I want a fancy ring or even a big wedding. Maybe you can have both???? : )

Jenny said...

Ok, so I'm currently in this very dilemma, so funny you should mention it! Our 10th is coming up in May, and I've dropped LOTS of hints about a many that Jamie felt the need to tell me to STOP dropping hints..ahem. Anyway, we are going to Sweden in July to celebrate our anniversary, so I was informed that I couldn't have both. WHAT?!?!? I'm not usually fussy about stuff, but I was really counting on a ring, since I haven't gotten one since we got married. Maybe this makes me shallow, but I feel your pain, girl! What to do...??

Ivy said...

I think a new ring would be very exciting! Instead of getting a totally new ring could you maybe add to your current ring? Add a couple of small diamonds on the side? I don't think it's shallow at all to want a new deserve it!!

Anonymous said...

1.Don't clean up so much! We will be fine--we're not company!! Really.
2. I love Owen's name..I just said Daddy's real middle name is "Owens"--I love Owen! You made me sound critical!! Noooo!
Love you, Mom

Lydia said...

I would choose the ski trip for two reasons:
1)I have never been skiing.
2)My ring was designed by my hubby and the main stone is from my mother's original engagement ring.

BUT--if I didn't have those two factors, I would TOTALLY go for the ring!! A girl should never, ever turn down a diamond! :-)

Gray Matters said...

As a matter of fact this July is our 10 year anniversary. Since it's the summer we are taking a little trip to the beach . . . together . . . alone! So I obviously choose the trip - but it's also not a fair question because my engagement ring is perfect. He also designed it himself - with much direction, of course!

annieck said...

First off, I think Izzy has a brain tumor. Just had to put that out there. Of course, I missed parts of the episode where they did all the tests on her, so that may have already been ruled out. :)

As for the ring vs. vacation...that's a tough one. I never knew about this 10 year thing. I am a super sentimental person, though, so I have always intended to use my same rings. Of course, I really love my rings, so I can't envision changing them. Channing picked well. :)
With skiing, I am totally disinterested in being cold and flying down a mountain on skis. I am a warm-weather vacationer. So between those two choices, I have NO idea. For me, I would choose a trip to Hawaii. That would be my ultimate 10 year anniversary.

A couple of years ago, I heard John Tesh (I know, how OLD am I?) talking about this same kind of thing. He was asking the question of what is more important...a family vacation or a new car? He said vacations are more important because while your "stuff" becomes old to you, familiar, your vacation memories will always linger. Since hearing that, I've always had it in the back of my mind.

Good luck choosing! Good thing you've got two years!!! :):):) Oh, sorry for the novel!

becky said...

hmmmm...i'm going with vacation b/c micah and i have never been anywhere alone since having kids. yep. you heard me right. there is always a few more years for a ring upgrade. who's to say you couldn't do that for your birthday??

Lisa said...

I'd go vacation. I love the ring I got when he proposed and wouldn't want a different one.

Kellie said...

I LOVE my ring, so I would definitely say vacation - to a WARM TROPICAL place! I would like to take ALL the children (leaving them behind puts too much stress on me) but would like to take a BABYSITTER along with us so Will and I could still have time alone!

Eve said...

I would definitely choose the trip, but that's because we just don't go on big vacations often. It would have to be a special occasion and what's more special than 10 years???

Sherill said...

As an OLD married lady (26 years last months), I say go with the trip. Of course, that has been my choice for years. A ring won't help build your relationship, but trips do! No kids and time to simply be the couple you used to be and will be in the future.

Now I did get a ring upgrade for our 20th. We didn't take a long trip. We went back to the church in Gadsden where we were married and a clergy friend officated as we renewed our vows with the kids present and so we were able to have the new ring blessed! It was very nice.

Of course, truth be told, I'll choose travel and time with family over bling any day of the week, so I'm biased.

LOOK WHO'S MARRIED!!!! said...

I want the ring. A vacation is a great memory that you'll have forever...but you'll also get to look down on your hand and see a BLINGED out diamond that took you 10y ears to earn...go with the ring. You can always take a less expensive weekend ski-trip another time.

Carrie said...

I've never heard of the 10 year thing either. I've always just thought the wedding ring was the one you would have forever, or until it wore out that it couldn't hold the stone anymore.

I'm all for the trip. Another way to think of it - 50 years from now, which would you rather have had? Time alone together is much more precious than any rock in my opinion.

Laura said...

initially I was going with the vacation, but I also just got married and just got my wedding ring, so that seems like a distant thought to change it...and you, of course, were a child bride...(just kidding!), and 10 years is a big if you have a choice, maybe go for the ring revamp, and a vacation?! Now I'm just being greedy.

Nicole said...

I got the 10 year ring (as a surprise)...I think I missed that memo because I didn't know I was supposed to. And it is oh so pretty (...even though two of the diamonds just popped out AND I almost lost one.) So in hind-sight...a ring. But before-sight? The trip.

BASSakward Tales said...

i would choose the vacation because my hubby designed my wedding ring and i don't get to travel much...the other reason i would choose the vacation is because there might not be cell signal...that would be music to my ears....

Lori said...

Well, in the department of 7th grade trauma, I am still scarred from a mullet-type hair cut that I got from a guy who looked like Michael Bolton. :)

As for the big question - I'd go for the trip as well. I'd definitely give the ring some thought, but in the end the time together and the memories we'd make would win out.

Have a good weekend!

meredith said...

I guess it is my turn to weigh in. I would pick the trip for several reasons. A) It will make you both better parents to have that time away to relax and rejuvenate. B) It will bring you closer together.
My dad wanted to get my mom a new ring one year for their anniversary but she said no. She told me that my dad gave her that ring. One day I will tell you the story of when we thought she had lost the ring. My husband did a good job on my ring and couldn't ask for anything more. Plus we are dying to go back to Maui. So I choose the trip. Hope this helps!

Susannah said...

I think I would go with the vacation! He did pick out the ring and yes while the upgrade would be nice, I would just keep it. That's just me, but I love to travel!

holly said...

Izzy has a brain tumor I would think. I would pick the trip for sure. I don't care about jewelry, and so far, I still love my ring. And you dreamed that up that you are supposed to get an upgrade. So you and Beyonce can just "Upgrade, upgrade" to DirecTV and be happy with your ring!

Shana said...

Ok, clearly Izzy has metastatic disease to her brain - probably melanoma or something. - dr. burke

NOW- I would totally take the ski trip!! fun memories, pics, AND weight loss...heck yeah, you know how many calories you burn skiing and what a great muscle work out that is...what's up.

and maybe a ring upgrade later..but isn't your ring fabulous already?? :)

Donna said...

Okay- I didn't get in on this- but to me the answer is clearly the ring. Clearly. No question. At all. I can ski in Gatlinburg in my jeans for all I care! :)

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