Sunday, March 22, 2009

A few pointers to the Squad in 1993

Dear HA Varsity Cheerleading Squad of 1993,


{In case you can’t spot me, I’m in the dead center- obviously because I’m the tallest, right?}
1. I know. I know. These are the cutest cheerleading uniforms“of all time”. You had them made by a seamstress in town because you didn’t want to order any like everyone else’s.
But they will not allow you to jump AT ALL. There is a reason that people buy those stretchy material ones instead of starched, pressed cotton.
2. Speaking of the cute uniforms, people who don’t know that the name of our school is Houston Academy will read them as “HA”- a laugh. As a squad at cheerleader camp, people will call you “HA HA HA HA HA”. Yes, they’re all gonna laugh at you.
3. You do need to go over your routine ONE MORE TIME before the pep rally. You will drop the red head on the end {Tiffany} more times than you will break up with your collective boyfriends.
4. Just because you can do a “black light” dance does not mean you have rhythm. You are the whitest white girls ever to attempt to dance to “It takes two to make a thing go right”. Ever.
5. I know you don't want to hear this, but you are the skinniest you will ever be in your life. If you call your self fat one more time I’m going to turn off that 90210 season finale before you can fist pump in the opening song.

Thank you very much, girls. Return to formation please. {Remember to not “break” your wrists.}
Have a fun time and soak up high school. It will fly by quicker than Milli Vanilla could have their Grammy taken away.


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annieck said...

You crack me up! Those are quite the unique uniforms. :) Ha!

Anonymous said...

Ready? Ok, Missy... so the uniforms were my doing. I take the blame. I had them designed and made to be sassy and unique. And although you may critique... nothing could be more preppier than navy and white gingham wrap skirts with nary a fattening pleat. We had a responsibility to be the front runners in "cheerleading fashion"; decked out from head to toe. And, as a plus, they didn't dare show our bloomers because (as already said) there was only so far that our legs would actually go. Of course, if we're being honest, we jumped about as well as we danced. That is, if you don't count being thrown from the top of the pyramid stance. The collective rhythm of the whole squad deserves more than a chuckle, even more than a belly laugh, but you might get away with a great big "HA!". Although, for what we lacked in rhythm, we more than made up for in enthusiasm with our "Rah, Rah, Rahs...". We could raise up our megaphones and shake our pompoms till we dropped. I can't count the times we yelled and giggled far after the clocks had stopped. We certainly knew how to usher those players on and off the court, field, or even through the gymnasium doors. And, I have no idea who would have yelled, "Don't break your wrist, return to formation, resume your spot on the floor!". Certainly, it was not ever me. I was as kind as a captain could be. In fact, I think I was the one who said , "No need to go over this routine one more time, everyone gets a pass!". So, one could say that I'm responsible for the many times you dropped Tiffany on her ass :) And, as for me (as circumstances might have it)... I'll have you know... at 32 I am now the skinniest I will ever be. But I assure you not the tallest. Back then, my hair added quite a few inches; at least a good two or three. I can't remember ever parting my hair that far to the side with such a dramatic swooping swirl. Could someone have done a "hot roller intervention"? Please! Nobody ever needs that much unnatural curl! I can't recall if this was my year to be the caption or the co. However, unfortunately, I do recall every note in the theme song to 90210. I am almost getting dizzy as my senses recall the heady scent of banner paint and the heaviness of that white paper on a roll. Fortunately, I don't recall the names of all our crushes, that caused us all to bat our eyes, flirt shamelessly, and go crazy at each field goal. I do recall some tears and phone calls till the wee morning hours. I'll never forget the rain on my face when we twirled and danced on muddy football fields during unexpected showers. I can still hear the laughter and the lyrics to "Brown Eyed Girl" that rocked the van each time we set off to a game in some small unknown Southern town. I can feel the the gym floor shake and the bleachers began to rumble as each Friday pep rally went down. And, who could forget, the heat on our backs from the sparks crackling in those fall Homecoming bonfires. As for the black light dance done afterwards, we practiced for ridiculously endless hours. Hide your hands, don't loose count, and never smile- your teeth will start to glow! Now, spread your fingers wide, it's time for the finale of the show! And, let me just note how flammable synthetic "stretchy materials" always seem to be... we could barely move... but we could stand the heat. Maybe those uniforms were actually functional, rather than just too cute to be beat? Don't thank me now, although I possibly saved your life with my choice for our attire. No stop, drop, and role to save you when your uniform caught on fire! Actually, it's me who should be thanking everyone in the picture shown above. How do you begin to quantify the love? In plentiful hugs, whispered secrets, and laughter till it hurt? In all the solidarity when calling "what's his name" a jerk? In girl fights and sleepover nights? In teaching me the wisdom (who cares about the rhythm) of "It takes two to make a thing go right."? In chilly nights under the lights sharing blankets to block the cool. Thank you all, my beloved friends, for all the memories and fun shared in our small high school. Here's to the HA cheerleading squad of 1993; near, far, or wherever you may be. You're all a part of my heart... and that's the deepest place in me. -- AMH

LeAnne said...

Hillary...this is AWESOME!!! maybe i should go dig out some old school cheerleader pics...uuummmmm, NOOOOOOO!!!!

VanderbiltWife said...

Heh. Too cute.

Also, I look at every picture of myself from high school and think, I thought I was fat THEN??

And PS you are precious now too!

Holley said...

WOW!! That is a picture!! Boy did I ever think I was cool in that uniform! The pic does not show my real uniform! I had mine shortened sometime and it was SUPER short! I could not sit down without showing my ass!! I thought that was cool back then! Too funny!! I can't remember every word to the fight song, but I remember every move!! Not that I was any good at it! I still can't dance!! But it sure was a lot of fun!!!!

Kellie said...

GREAT picture - I have got to get a scanner to do some of these throwbacks...and how come everyone in that picture was blessed to be nearly the same height as you - maybe not Holley, and where was Elizabeth Ann - they are my "shorties"? If I had been in school with ya'll, i could have "rounded" ya'll out with a short person, not that I would have wanted to have been dropped though! I can remember coming to HA to watch some of your pep rallies and they were always a blast!

Domestically Sassy! said...

I'm so jealous..I always wanted to be a CHEERLEADER!! I was to chicken to try out! All I wanted was the outfit anyway ;)

LOOK WHO'S MARRIED!!!! said...

Wow. Awesome throw-back picture. Despite not being a cheerleader, I enjoyed that blast from the past.

I should have been a cheerleader.

Susannah said...

Cute picture! As a former cheerleading sponsor, I'd have to go with you and say that yes, the outfit makes it hard to move. They were cute though...:) Cute, cute, cute! How was Dothan?!

Lydia said...

As a member of the (5 person) HA Varsity squad of 1995, I would like to personally thank you for the "cutest cheerleading uniforms of all time" hand-me-downs. I agree that they were, in fact, non-strechable. And did you mention that they were a little bit itchy too? Ha! I will say that they carried our little 9th grade selves to a Spirit Stick win at cheerleading camp that year. (Ok, ok, I will find a picture and post it on my blog...)
Just so you know, we thought you Varsity girls were sooo cool...and then tried to remember what Aubrie had taught us when our turn came to fill your shoes!
Thanks for this blast from the past. ~Lydia

Laura said...

Ah, those were the days! Loved Aubrie's comment too!!

Hadley said...

that was a HOOT! I was laughing out husband asking what I was laughing at, but he just wouldn't get it!

Amy said...

So I'm catching up on your posts. What a treat. My husband just asked me what I was laughing (out loud) about. Too bad you can't
"Blame it on the Rain" when it comes to those uniforms. HeHe.
Oh you do start my day off right.

Hollie and Janie said...

we private school girls LOVED a homemade uniform.... we had a uniform one year with tons of ribbons and thought they were to die for!!!

Sonia Parker said...

Those uniforms are "HA"-larious! You make me want to go scrounge up some old photos! Thanks for sharing!

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